I Lost 180 Pounds last week**!

In response to Bag Lady, (but did you get an answer? Inquiring minds want to know!)

Yes, I got a response. A weak one. One that DID NOT make me go weak in the knees, however. I'm tired of this one. He's so obvs not interested. Time to move on. I mean our last date was 1 MONTH ago! He txts, he messages, but no dates. Loser.*

*I'm kidding. He's kind of awesome. But so am I. So he can suck it if he doesn't realize that.

And this little gal made it to the gym a record 2x last week & supplemented with walks in the park. Success! Weigh in tonight. We'll see. We'll see.

**I'm guessing the Photographer weighs about 180... hahahaha

Friday Is a Good Day

I have nothing interesting to say.

Nothing except, I am now officially committed to pain & tortuous personal training for *at least* the next 3 months. I'm equal parts nauseous & excited. I can't wait. D-day is 9/28. Let the games begin!

x

Losing It!

Sweet Mother. I lost a pound last week! Only 79 more to go! That's right; I said 79. Sheesh. Amazing what depression, tragedy, & stress will do to a person.

Anything else to report on the beautiful Monday? Boys, perhaps?? Well, the Photographer continues to elude me. He txts me, he makes plans to come to birthday party, he alludes there will be presents... He doesn't show. His reason was valid. Trust me -- I checked his alibi. That sounds a tad more psycho than it really is.

Anyway, he seems interested. He's initiating conversation; he's just not doing a whole lot else. Sigh.

Whatever It Takes

People, listen up because this may be the last time you hear from me. No, I'm not shutting down my blog. I fear it's something much more awful than that. I sign back up for personal training, yes THAT personal training. So, I'm fully anticipating either death by dumbbell or sheer exhaustion, both of which leave no room for blogging.

And quite frankly I'm scared. PT is one thing I fear. It's like your own private season of Biggest Loser. You've seen the show; you know how it is. That is how it is. It's awful. It's horrible. It's sweaty and undignified. There will be tears I'm sure.

So why am I doing it? Because nothing else is working. After decades of dieting, I've lost that spark. That desire to keep going. Nothing else has worked to bring back that spark quite like personal training.

I'm sure my blahness has a lot to do with the fact that I still haven't gone to see a shrink/therapist/counselor/whatever. That really is my bad. It's just so daunting to confess your soul to a complete stranger.

With that said, if any of you have experience in Cognitive Process Therapy, give me a shout. I'd much rather confess my soul to my internet peeps! :)

Pause for Commercial Break

I deleted the last post. I'm a paranoid gal. All I need is for the Photographer to Google some random words and stumble upon his very heartfelt email... I am trying to get the guy to like me after all!

New approach:

No more texting, calling or emailing first (even though he responds) 

No more initiating dates (even though he pays)

If he wants to see me then he needs to make a little effort too. I mean, I kissed him for crying out loud, and he freaked. I'm at a loss with this one. *shrugs shoulders*

As far as WW goes, I haven't been to a meeting in weeks. Not because I'm avoiding the scale, but I've literally been unavailable -- out of town, sick, meetings, etc. I will be going back though, soon! I see light at the end of the tunnel.